Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in iam_notforsale's LiveJournal:

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Sunday, April 24th, 2005
8:30 pm	this means war! (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, April 23rd, 2005
11:48 am	i think i've finally figured it out.......... (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 21st, 2005
9:55 am	i'm tired of the same games i'm tired of the same jokes i'm tired of the same memories i'm tired of the same people i'm tired of the same day, over and over again i'm tired of the same expectations i'm just tired. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 19th, 2005
9:43 pm	there's the good the bad and the ugly (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, April 18th, 2005
9:56 am	matt - you're right. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, April 15th, 2005
8:53 pm	"That is precisely what it is: there is nothing either amusing or witty about it, it is simply cruel and stupid" quote from Leo Tolstoy (the master himself) Many literary works are based on the universal theme of a loss of innocence. They are written about the first time a human being discovers how crude and abhorrent the world really is. Seamus Heaney used a 'flaxdam' full of frogs to explore the concept and Tennesee Williams uses the poor victim Blanche to expose the barbarity of mankind. This extract, however, is not exploring a loss of innocence but rather an aquisition of indifference. just something random for you all. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, April 11th, 2005
4:17 pm	i need to learn when to stop. i guess i don't realise the effect i can have. perhaps it's naivity. (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, April 3rd, 2005
11:32 pm	quote from mum that sums up my netball game "you're not playing this game ever again" hmm, i guess that's what a mother says when their daughter has be crunched between two players and has hit the deck. no more netball for me - well, not playing anyway, i will come and cheer and wear long stripey socks, but not step on court. anyway, what happened. - going for the ball, got slammed between two people, one with their hip against my upper leg and the other smashed into my lower leg, causing them to go different ways (sideways, the way knees aren't supposed to bend). i hear a lovely crunching sound in my knee and fly onto the floor. it hurt. really hurt.i thought that it had hurt when i'd jarred my other knees those times - ha, that's nothing compared to this, i couldnt' breath. not a nice feeling. also not a nice feeling is people trying to stand me up - i've decided that people don't listen to the person that's hurt. especially my dad. i wanted to hit him. i also wanted to hit him later in the hospital because he thought he'd have a look in the x-ray room by himself! then he started playing with my bed (kinda like homer - bed goes up bed goes down), the humour wore off very quickly for me, but i think i was just grumpy anyway. i know what you were all thinking on court "oh look, sarah's hurt another knee, drama queen" heh, well, i wasn't being dramatic, i have actually damaged it. sat the rest of the game off (obviously) with ice on my knee and hippy trying ot feed me (thanks hippy). we lost - again. had an argument when we got in the car - mum and dad yelling. ended up going to hospital and having x-rays. the nurse looked at my socks kinda strangely. hmm. diagnosis, can't really remember but something about ligaments - if it's the cruciate ligament (big important one) we won't know for 24 hours. sigh. so now i have pain killers - good stuff - crutches and a big knee brace (strangely enough in colours matching my socks, colour co-ordinated). no school for me tomorrow - except that i have to go in first thing and hand in my maths portfolio. so the moral of this story is - don't take your dad to hospital if you want to remain sane. oh, and netball is a dangerous sport. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, April 2nd, 2005
3:19 pm	another time, another place I want to live in the past. Not just my past, a time before me. i want to live in a time where our vocabulary extends beyond "like", "So..", "you know", putting "but" on the end of sentences, repacing words we don't know with inappropriate ramblings, saying "whatever" when incapable with coming up with a rebuttle, "yeah" instead of 'yes' and "nah" instead of 'no'. i want to live in a time where adults are addressed with respect and people actually speak to their neighbours. i guess this post is just a product of people's speech patterns and habits annoying me so much, but what will be next? will language become completely redundant and we'll just grunt at eachother and play an ungainly game of charades to get the message across. i hope not. maybe this is the beginning of de-evolution. it's happening. (Comment on this)
Thursday, March 31st, 2005
8:38 pm	parents going on holidays for a week in winter holidays. house to myself - now who to invite to join me...... (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 30th, 2005
7:46 pm	i have just been going through all of my word files.....and there are some very strange things in there. there have been far too many times where i've been bored and just started writing. heh, for example, i found the beginning of a commentary/essay that i wrote on me. it's....interesting. i've discovered that my perception of who i am has changed since i wrote that. perhaps i should make it a yearly task to have as a documentary of myself. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, March 28th, 2005
5:19 pm	well - that's the long weekend over. haven't done all the homework i wanted to but you know, we can't all be as motivated as carolyn. i don't mind, i had fun, even though i will pay the consequences for it, it just means i will have to work harder now. i won't bore you with a day by day account of the weekend....cos i'm sure you really don't care. i'll just give some high- and low-lights: -shopping, bought 4 tops, SOCKS and various other things. -imo's 18th, a mixture of good and bad and i LOVE the scandal. Happy b'day beautiful imogen. -happy because of lindt chocolate balls (thanks rob) -was educated as to the intracacies of foot ball (also thanks rob) -educated someone by watching the Exorcist at 3:30 in the morning (am now very tired) -had daniel over for tea, had big roast lamb, a very good night. -now, typing this to avoid doing all the homework sitting on my desk. -am supposed to make a cake for mansfield stall tomorrow, but just remembered then and i don't think i can. sorry erin. that is all. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, March 25th, 2005
2:05 pm	i feel myself picking up other peoples speech habits. everytime i say something that i know isn't me, i cringe. it is driving me crazy. i'm annoying myself. hmm, maybe another self improvement week is necessary, however painful. on a completely different topic, mum asked me again today...."Are you sure you don't fancy guys?" hmm. i just smiled. why answer? why does she ask questions she already knows the answers to? another different topic - maths portfolios suck. blake poems are kinda difficult to write commentaries on and documenting art works is time consuming. i'll just go ride my horse. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 22nd, 2005
9:38 pm	who the hell got live journal blocked from the school computers?! how inconvenient! (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, March 21st, 2005
8:36 pm	never has a weekend looked sooo interesting. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, March 19th, 2005
3:28 pm	there is certainly a sense of satisfaction in all of this. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, March 18th, 2005
5:33 pm	i have "slipper socks" they are rather nice. i shall describe them. pink, blue, and purple stipes, pink and fuzzy on the inside with grippy things on the bottom that look like sheep. heh. it's made my day just that little bit better. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 16th, 2005
7:32 pm	what do i have left? (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 15th, 2005
7:08 pm	when did you first wagon wheel? (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, March 10th, 2005
7:36 pm	she sat down and i saw the pain in her eyes. i don't want to stand in the way of her happiness with my petty selfish comforts. its time that i sacrifice something of mine for her benefit.....seeing as it has forever been the other way around. this is life changing. never before has she asked me how i would feel about her and dad splitting up. never before has she laid the consequences out for me and asked for my opinion. never before has she been this close to actually doing it. maybe this is just another bad time......although they are becoming far more frequent and longer lasting. its interesting that i can not possibly imagine myself living with just dad......yet living with just mum seems...well, almost normal. i have no connection with dad anyway, he has no interest or even concept as to what my life is like - so what difference would it make if he wasn't there. mum has made that same assumption, that i would live with her - and its the right one. i know i have freaked out about this happening a few times.....and each time it has been resolved to the point where existance for mum was semi-bearable.....and each time i didn't think that it would......but i don't know - this seems different. mum's discussing the logical practicalities of it all with me, and not just flinging emotions around. hmm.... i dont know what to think. (7 Comments |Comment on this)